So small and so big

(Photo courtesy of Justine Cooper Photography)

My son is small. He's tiny, in fact. He's perfectly normal size for his age, but perfectly normal for a 10 week old baby is quite small. His size makes me at once small and big. I've never felt smaller or bigger, in fact.

When he smiles at me I feel like a giant, as if I can conquer anything - invincible. I feel 20' tall and as strong as 10 men. He makes me feel bigger than I really am.

But, when I put him back to bed after nursing him in the wee hours of the night I look at him sleeping in his crib, breathing in and out, and I feel so small. I am humbled and awe struck, I feel even smaller than his tiny body in those moments.

I suppose this is parenthood - the big and the small of it all.